In response to B Hoody's List of great conversation heart gifts, I am please to present....
Steve's Semi-Autobiographical Top Ten List of What NOT to get your wife for Valentine's Day
10. The book, "Dick Cheney's Guide to Hunting Safety"
9. Clothes, because it will be too big (not good), too small (worse) or just right (still not good).
8. Thigh Master (self-explanatory)
7. Depilatory Products (possibly practical, but not very romantic)
6. Cookware (no matter how many times she has said she wants a dutch oven, this is not when she wants it.)
5. Anything that you would like to receive. (A Sand Wedge is an excellent gift for me, but apparently not a good choice for her.)
4. Swiss Army Spork
3. A Chia Pet
2. A Jew's Harp
1. Nothing, I don't need a special day to tell my wife I love her.
Happy Valentine's Day, and I hope that the rest of you don't need a special day to the special ones in your life that you love them.
- Steve
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3 comments:
I don't know this personally.....but a friend of mine told me once that.....Nair and Epil-Stop-&-Spray...holy monkey. Those things burn. It was like I had bumpy sun burn on my skin for two weeks! Remeber, or at least....thats what I heard.
I think I saw some clothes like that at a store here. It's called "The Village Shop." You can buy those, as well as flowery Hammer-pants. (You know, the kind made famous in gold and yellow by the Rap Masta' MC Hammer.) Steve, next time you're going to get something like that for Jan, let me know. I'll see if we can get you a discount.
(And Jan, I'll make sure that it's all returnable!)
mr. bowdens is diferrent
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